A massive dose of Nothing: Welcome to a Purposeless World

March 27, 2008

It’s been a while since I’ve actually sat down and studied. Or, for that matter, worked hard. I’ve got into a mode of narcotic existence-I live like a druggie,  craving sleep even when I cannot possibly BE sleepy. I feel overwhelmed by the amount I need to cover; I have missed far too many classes this year. I do not recall any Eliot, Keats, Byron. I slept through Sons and Lovers,  Mrs. Dalloway (although being awake wouldn’t have made a difference). I missed Conrad classes…actually, the only texts I am ‘comfortable’ with I can count on me fingertips…

These finals will be HELL. Sigh.

Sculpt the memories, don’t let them flow… March 15, 2008

The ceremonies are done with. We have ‘graduated’. Now all one needs to do is pass the exams.

(Time to prepare to usher in Panic Times again)

I shall miss it all. The life and times of an undergraduat student.

I read this line in a poem, and I think it is absolutely beautiful.

‘Hold the wind,

Don’t let it blow.’

That’s really what I want to do right now. Hold the wind and suspend us in time. For an eternal instant. And then push play, and get on with life.

March 9, 2008

Writer’s block.

*Croak*

March 7, 2008

So today it was to be. Mine last day at college. No more LSR, no more college life. Phew, that’s quite something to take. I don’t know if it has sunk in as yet.  😦 I can’t believe I’m not going to be seeing my class anymore, sitting in those rooms, yelling in the English Corridor…

No more assignments to submit, no more dreaded deadlines…

No more events to organise and participate in…

No more waking up at 7:30AM and occassionally making the bus journey to college…running in 15 minutes(and no more!) late…

Classes with MG, DN, SC, SN….

Doodling in notebooks, reading graffiti (and making some 😉 ) …

I can’t believe I will not be waking up to 9-5 days at college anymore. I’m not ready to leave, waaaah! 😦

March 2, 2008

I love archives. And for the past two years, archiving my life has become almost easy, what with the blog amongst other things. I was going through March 2007, and it brought back a flood of memories…Maiden 17/03/07… Bangalore…events related to the two…exams…extended study sessions into the night in my own room, with loud music to keep me company.

This March has begun differently, and I know what I had last year I can never have again. But such is life, isn’t it? One can never tread the same path, and even if one does, the experience is always different. The joys are of the moment, so it is the moment that ought to get the due.

I graduate this month; I don’t think that has sunk in as yet. Three years of college don’t seem to be such a long time, but curiously enough, they are. I can only imagine being in college, yet at the same time, I can’t imagine being here for more than three years. It’s as if the three years are suspended in time, and I wish it to go on being.

I’m not very good with change. I like my familiarity. And this has been, and will go on being, a year of dislocation and relocation. I wonder when the skein of old joy will reveal itself, and if it will allow me to play cat and mouse as I did last year.

One can only hope. |-)

March 1, 2008

After sleeping ALL day, how on earth do I still feel sleepy? My love for sleep baffles me sometimes. It defies all logic, and I don’t like that.

I’m trying to work on an article about EmployAbility 2008, a job fair for disabled people, which was conducted on the 23rd and 24th of Feb. A bunch of friends and I were trying to document it, and the marvelous affair that it was, it deserves a good article. The problem is, I don’t know how to begin. I don’t know how to settle into it. And I don’t know what all I should be putting into it.

I got to meet some great people there; one of the candidates had severely impaired mobility, he was basically using his hands to swing himself in motion, his feet were useless, and yet he was there at DPS, R.K Puram on Saturday, and Pragati Maidan on Sunday. One gentleman from Indore, a professor, was there hoping to get a job in Delhi. He had a beautiful radio voice, spoke the most perfect Hindi. Speaking to him was inspirational. Then there were countless other people, some of who I tagged down on the second day, and basically kept hounding for bytes every hour or so 🙂 Remarkable patient they all were. Nobody told me to bugger off, although a woman and a boy, who we chose to refer to as Aggressive Woman and Aggressive Boy, pounced on us, questioning our intentions. Very self-righteous they were, imagining they had been wronged by Ability Foundation, that the advertisement had originally said CHENNAI as the venue for the fourth EmployAbility event, and that it was unfair to then bring it to delhi, bla bla. I do sympathise with her, having to travel a long way for a job is never fair, but for petes sake! Atleast make sure your grouse is well-founded!

The many recruiters of HCL were great to talk to. I think my bias against corporates eased a bit after talking to them.

Ofcourse, there were amusing incidences there as well. We spoke to the MD of CavinKare (or KavinCare…I always mix that up) for five minutes before discovering that he was not the CEO of naukri.com as we had been assuming! Quite embarrassing!

A fair few people landed jobs. More were promised a call back. But, I do not justice to the event or the article by this kind of a disconnected, jarring post. I shall come back to it later.

Adios, and check out http://www.abilityfoundation.org/ till then.