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November 29, 2007

Posted by K in Fiction.
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“Oh Dada! Where are you headed? This is a one-way only corridor”

“I am headed to my native place. I believe the train is discharging from that platform?”

 

“No,no! Where have you been living Dada? That platform has been a ghost platform for two years now! No train has left or entered this place since Babu Ram cursed that track while he bled to death.”

 

“But I have ticket! Look, here, it reads: ’20:00 Platform 9’. I am looking for The Mail Express. Surprised,no? How can man with bag travel with letters? I have contact. Very good friend. He makes phone call, and bus! Done.”

 

“Dada-wait, what is your name?”

 

“Babu Ram”

 

“Babu Ram!”

 

“Yes. My grandmother gave. She said I was her little babu and that I will have virtue of Ram.”

 

“Okay, Babu (you don’t mind if I call you just Babu, right?) somebody has led you a dance. NO train comes here, not even the Mail Express, and even if it did, how would you have got a ticket for an illegal ride?”

 

“Eh? But look! I have-“

 

“Yes Babu, I see that piece of paper, but you must understand that in today’s day and age, anybody can make any sort of paper! My own brother showed the lawyer a Will that my father had actually not made, and took away my share of the land.”

 

“I am beginning to get irritated with you. You are not telling me helpful things.”

 

“Haha, Babu! Truth is seldom helpful, it seems!”

 

“Are you going to be telling me Philosophy now? Because let me tell you, I have BA in Philosophy, second class. My friends and relatives come to me when they have problem of existence.”

 

“No,no, Babu, I don’t give anything but occasional love to the occasional urchin.”

 

“I have no meaning with your love! I have meaning only with my train! It leaves in one hour! I have to be on it!!”

 

 

“Babu, do you know anything about why this track is closed?”

“No, because this track is never closed to me!”

 

“And why is that?”

 

“Oh dear. What will I do now? You are beginning debate with me. You say you will not let me through-“

 

“Because, Babu, there is nothing there!”

 

“-and if I don’t go through, my train will depart without me.”

 

“Come, Babu. Sit down. I have some nuts.”

 

“What will I do with your nuts,eh? I have my own.”

 

“Without a doubt, but sit down anyway.”

 

“I am sitting. But only because my shoe is hurting.”

 

“You should do what I do. I wear my skin. Shoes never were my thing.”

 

“I am sure that is because your mother did not put good habit in you.”

 

“My mother did not put anything in me. She died at childbirth. But yes, they never felt that people like me needed shoes. I grew up envying covered feet, but now I’m glad my feet never stink.”

 

“Are you saying I have smelly feet?”

 

“No, Babu, why should I pass judgment on your feet? I am just talking. It is not everyday that I get to talk to someone, so when I do, I prolong the conversation as much as I can.”

 

“Uff, this is too much. I refuse to be your prolonging object. I am getting up, and I am going. I have worked hard all my life, and I have promised to go home with earnings, and now I am.”

 

“Okay, Babuji, go ahead. I have been guarding this place for two years now, and you are the first man I’ve seen in as much time. So go ahead, if you disbelieve me-OH!”

 

“There. What did I tell you? Train has come, and now I board it for Native place. Grandmother is waiting.”

 

“Are you wanting water? You are looking quite ill. Goodbye, I go now. And I like you to call my full name next time. Grandmother called me Babu Ram.”

—————————————————————————————————————————–

This was supposed to be a dialogue-only story, with no narration whatsoever. I debated using a different style, but finally went with this one.

The use of pidgin english is deliberate; in my own head, I have two parallel speaking systems, both equally dominant. I think I compromise and speak a bit of both.

 

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Ole! (With an accent, like the bull fighting chappies) November 26, 2007

Posted by K in Blog equivalent of forwards.
7 comments

Random Humour
Three men walked into a bar……

….Ouch!

ROFLMAO!!

*eyes* Okay, you must admit you fell off your chair laughing. You did. You know you did.

Okay, and also “You are not only genius, you are INDIgenous” :D:D This,ofcourse, comes from DDLJ. Which I saw for the first time this saturday. On Emiko’s insistence. Emiko has an SRK wallpaper on her desktop. And while I haven’t yet fallen that deep, I must admit I am newly addicted to Bollywood and Shahrukh Khan 😀

Random Book

Sorting Out Billy. Must I explain?
Random Boredom

Writing Scream for me Bangalore!! on every write-able surface, and then scratching it out to replace Bangalore with Bombay. But that isn’t exactly boredom…

Boredom would be writing ‘Friday’ on all my notes today, then regretfully scratching it out to replace it with ‘Monday’. But that was a genuine mistake(or wishful thinking).

Random boredom-tripping in my head I guess. Checking the net 10 times each day just for the heck of it.

Random Worries

All my teeth falling out before their time.

All my hair falling out before their time.Actually, ANY time.

Yes, it’s all physical. I’m fickle.

Random Memories

Making up whoppers about dramatically falling on a crow that was lying with it’s beak up in the air, and having the beak pierce my stomach. I don’t remember if I needed hospitalisation and/or medical attention. Not, I suspect…

Random Realizations
I’m selfish.

I like my time alone.

I eat. A lot.

I spend a lot of money on food.

I use ‘I’ a lot.

My social skills wold make most people weep.

I like randomness.

I’m not as ‘growed up’ as I think or wish.

Oh, and I tag everybody on my blogroll. I mean it!

November 19, 2007

Posted by K in Uncategorized.
4 comments

A queer sort of madness has seized me, and I’m delighting in it…now,only now, my Inner Voice prods me to add. I have a Foucault assignment to submit tomorrow and I haven’t as yet even begun to read the paper. My mind is lost in the maze of nothingness and strange surreality. I’m floating even as I yank at the cord binding me to history. I’m straining against the rubber skin that has been my lakshman rekha till date, and I don’t know how far the rubber doth stretch.

I feel like Pavlov’s dog, everytime the bell rings, its a surprise, but eventually the carrot will get me conditioned,it will.

(No, I guess that doesn’t make sense. But, in my current world of strangeness…it really doesn’t matter!)

November 10, 2007

Posted by K in Uncategorized.
5 comments

I can never make up my mind about festivals. I want to like them, and feel all Festive and Joyous. Except, everybody seems to think that Festive and Joyous is how the day ought to feel…and because finding a day of un-ending, uninterrupted joyousness is a near impossibility (shit happens; its a fact of life), the heightened expectations just make it all the worse. There are times when I want to scream I HATE bloody Occassions (now including birthdays), and there are times when I go all dopey and feel all goey, and ‘connected’ (to what? with what?).

The last of all Occassions (atleast for the bangaali) approaches. Bhai Phota. Except, I probably won’t be doing much phota-ing because I left Yeats, Swift AND Foucault (and Gramsci and Althuser) for today. Oh, and did I mention? The remaining litfest details (*DRUMROLL* LiTMUS 2007: The English Literary Fest ) are to be sorted today. And I shall attempt to balance the Litfesting Fixing with the academicking with reading God Of Small Things…yet another book that I refused to touch till now because it was raved about (but atleast sometimes I am right…Five Point Someone was horrible). It is quite un-put-downable.

In a tiny little aside, the JMC english entrance test had (as I now discover) a passage from this very book. And I now see how completely off the mark my interpretation was…if I remember correctly, I read incest into it. Oh well. Atleast I had fun supporting my argument,lol. And,really, for someone who hasn’t read the book, the extract could have signified incest!! *tries to convince she-doesn’t-know-who*

In an edit: (And I do feel smug about this… :p) There IS incest! I wasn’t so off the mark afterall, haha. :p

Begun Bhaja November 6, 2007

Posted by K in Hilarity.
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18 comments

Go to images.google.com

Type ‘begun bhaja’

The second result throws up(http://images.google.com/images?gbv=2&svnum=10&hl=en&q=begun+bhaja&btnG=Search+Images) – ‘Arry. And no, that is not some bong eatery. That is Steve Harris, Japanese for God.

Mildly astonished that I was, I clicked on it to see who in their madness called Steve a fried brinjal, and I see it is…me.  Well, technically, tis the fault of WordPress. Steve and begun bhaja both occupy my Go Play! page…but WHY they would show up inter-changeably I have no idea, I am sure…

November 5, 2007

Posted by K in Uncategorized.
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‘Studying’ on the net is a highly distraction-prone activity.

In other matters, the blog has been lying dormant, as has been promised. That may change soon, till then, activate your RSS feeds! 😀