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November 30, 2006

Posted by K in Fiction.
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Meera put one foot on top of the other, and gleefully tumbled down.

“Mummy, you fell!!” giggled the five year old next to her.

Still laughing, Meera tousled the all-ready tousled hair of the child beside her. “Yes, baby, I fell”

————————————————————————

I just had to write this down; it can make for a handful of stories, each completely different.

I’d like your take on it, if you have the time; how would you write a story that began like this? Would you at all? Please share.

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Comments»

1. diana - November 30, 2006

I wouldn’t write this story, but I’m curious to see where it goes. 🙂

2. sporadicblogger - December 1, 2006

haha, when I have time i really want to continue it.

3. glandheim - December 2, 2006

I see Meera and the five year old on top of a grassy hill in a park-like environment. Meera is overcome by happiness at something that has happened, either some terrible part of her life has just ended or a wonderful part is about to begin.

Meera is gleeful, and she deliberately tripped herself to make her child laugh, and to have the fun of falling down on the grass, like a child.

So we have begun with a symbolic rebirth, like a baptism. If we really want to play on the symbolism, whatever part of Meera’s life has ended was a fall, from societie’s viewpoint. Either she lost her job, quit school, was disowned by her family, divorced by her husband.

But for Meera the fall is a leap forward, into a new life of the unknown, just her and her child.

No. I wouldn’t write this. Too hard. I’m too lazy{:

4. glandheim - December 2, 2006

Me again. I forgot to add: I’m curious what you were thinking with this beginning. If you think it should be written, you should write it. If you aren’t sure, tell a little more.

(I didn’t finish my previous post because my wife called me to dinner. Pepperoni and ham and eggs and cheese and onions and potatos, all fried together. A hot meal on a cold winter day. I _had_ to run:)

5. sporadicblogger - December 2, 2006

greg, are you a mind reader??? You have put down the very things I was thinking about. The falling down part, in terms of societal fall but meera not caring, the childlike glee at falling..everything! :stillstunned: You’re good at reading other people’s thoughts, unbelievably so.
Whoo, heh heh. Still getting over that piece of amazing..i dont even know what its called :p

Btw, that dinner almost made ME want to run 🙂 Sigh. I’m suddenly craving good food now. wonder why,lol.

6. glandheim - December 3, 2006

I’d like to say that I’m just so damn smart I scare myself, but in reality I just seem to have a talent for getting inside other people’s heads. It’s not exactly empathy — that would be getting inside their hearts.

You gave us so little information to go on that I thought every action had to be symbolic. It would make a cute poem.

It would make a _great_ story if you can pull it off. Great beginning.


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